What are your aspirations for yourself as we enter the last week of the self love challenge? My vision for this experience was to foster a sense of self liberation from beliefs that prevent us from truly knowing our worth and value. As you demonstrated in day 1’s exercises, our true essence is love. Therefore, a person will undoubtedly love themselves upon re-discovering the truth about who they are. Thus far, we have been encouraged to remain intentional and purposeful with our self choices in order to regain power over the beliefs that we are ascribing to ourselves. Today’s challenge urges us to become more convicted about who we are through self acceptance. Have you ever pondered that all important question: who am I? It takes a lifetime to fully awaken to our authentic selves as we continually evolve into more conscious versions of ourselves. Still, we must begin with a blue print vision of who we desire to be to guide that journey. This is an in-depth topic that I would typically explore more extensively in a coaching dynamic but I will endeavor to offer preliminary insights that can be valuable in the context of this self love challenge.
My own personal growth journey reveals that we do not necessarily need to “discover” ourselves but must simply choose to fully accept ourselves. We cannot erase whatever we reject about ourselves, whereby our resistance to this aspect of ourselves keeps us internally unhappy with ourselves. Let’s take for example a person who rejects themselves for not being “successful” enough and strives to validate their worth by pursuing their chosen means of success. They will likely overlook what innately makes them successful, making it difficult for external accomplishments to offer them the internal sense of success that is necessary to overcome their original limiting belief. Rather, self acceptance would entail such a person choosing to recognize and value what naturally makes them successful in their own unique nature. Doing so empowers them to conciously remain focused on an abundant aspect of their essence that would otherwise be neglected in their awareness. Such self awareness of ‘how’ they are innately successful subsequently enables believing in their potential during their pursuits. Therefore, the correct answer to who am I is : you are exactly everything that you wish to be by choosing to recognize your unique intrinsic self abundance in your desired ideals. In this example, self acceptance required letting go of a conditioned and limited definition or expectation of “success” that otherwise elicited one’s perceived sense of inadequacy. Thus, accepting yourself is choosing self abundance by recognizing the innate value that is always present in your natural talents and gifts. Interestingly, embracing the unique manner in which each person possesses whatever they deemed as lacking frees them feel like themselves. This explains why we can still remain unfulfilled after attaining a conditioned version of what we assumed would make us happy.
1.) Take inventory of the qualities that you still find difficult attributing to yourself. What expectation of yourself do you believe that you are not meeting to warrant your reluctance?
2.) Do you believe that it’s possible to ever fully meet those expectations and finally experience relieve in this aspect of your life? If so, how? If not, what would it look like to feel relieve and at peace in this aspect of your life?.
3.) Sitting in a comfortable position with your eyes closed, envision what it would feel like to accept yourself unconditionally. And repeat either of the three affirmations 5 times depending on comfort level:
–I love myself unconditionally
–I am beginning to love myself unconditionally
–I am open to accepting myself unconditionally.
Self acceptance is akin to the surrender of a thrashing swimmer finally choosing calmness in the waters and relenting on their forceful struggle to stay afloat. Much of what we resist in ourselves originated from a desire for social survival when we assumed that the approval of others was necessary to feel safe and belong. However, self acceptance relieves us from internal inadequacy in the same ironic manner that the swimmer does not anticipate remaining afloat when they cease resistance. The expectations we have of ourselves are actually not missing within us but remain undiscovered if we try to validate them externally. Self acceptance frees us to focus on our true value and rediscover the wholeness we felt was missing.
Cheers until tomorrow,